{"id":161,"date":"2006-07-30T17:01:29","date_gmt":"2006-07-30T17:01:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.luanmorina.com\/blog\/?p=161"},"modified":"2020-08-05T13:38:49","modified_gmt":"2020-08-05T13:38:49","slug":"groucho-marx","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.luanmorina.com\/blog\/humor\/groucho-marx\/","title":{"rendered":"Groucho Marx"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts\">\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-to\">Haven&#8217;t we seen each other somewhere before?<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-bo\">I don&#8217;t think so. I don&#8217;t think I am seeing you now. It must be something I ate.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts\">\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-to\">This lady is my wife. You should be ashamed.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-bo\">If this lady is your wife, you should be ashamed.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts\">\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-to\">Hey what are doing with that cigar in your mouth?<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-bo\">Why? Do you know another way you can smoke it?<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts\">\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-to\">A four year old child could understand this.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-i-bo\">Run out and get me a four year old child. I can&#8217;t make head or tail out of it.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">I&#8217;ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn&#8217;t it.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">You&#8217;re one the best women I have ever seen. And that is not saying so much for you.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">I don\u2019t want to be part of a club that would have me as a member.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">I never forget a face, but in your case I&#8217;ll be glad to make an exception.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">Don&#8217;t look now, but there&#8217;s one man too many in this room and I think it&#8217;s you.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn&#8217;t sell much \u2013 just an occasional sun visor.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">I&#8217;m not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">Man does not control his own fate; the women in his life do that for him.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">You know, you haven&#8217;t stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">Middle age is when you go to bed at night and hope you feel better in the morning; old age is when you go to bed at night and hope you wake up in the morning.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">I drink to make other people interesting.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">You&#8217;ve got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I bet he was glad to get rid of it.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">She got her good looks from her father, he\u2019s a plastic surgeon.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">You\u2019re just wasting your breath, and that\u2019s no great loss either.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">I like my cigar, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts mwd-jts-i-si\">Here&#8217;s to our wives and girlfriends\u2026 may they never meet!<\/div>\n<div class=\"mwd-jts-divider mwd-jts-divider-transparent mwd-jts-divider-stp\"><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Haven&#8217;t we seen each other somewhere before? I don&#8217;t think so. I don&#8217;t think I am seeing you now. It must be something I ate. This lady is my wife. You should be ashamed. If this lady is your wife, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.luanmorina.com\/blog\/humor\/groucho-marx\/\" class=\"read-more\">Read More &#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":163,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[5],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Groucho Marx - Blog Luan Morina<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.luanmorina.com\/blog\/humor\/groucho-marx\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Groucho Marx - Blog Luan Morina\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Haven&#8217;t we seen each other somewhere before? 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